Lost in Translation: Part I

I'm writing a Lost in Translation series of blog posts that contain conversations that I've had with people, as well as some hilarious pictures of things that were clearly mistranslated from Korean to English. We'll start with one word that has a bunch of different meanings. By the way, these are real talks I had with real people; I'm not making them up, I promise!

MAYBE

Example 1
Korean Teacher: "There will be a monsoon in Daegu today. Maybe school will be closed."
What the Korean Teacher really means: "Yep, we're gonna have a monsoon today, but don't worry about it, because school never closes unless we're all legit dying. Even then, most people will still come to work, including students, to demonstrate their diligence and devotion to education."

In this instance, maybe = absolutely not, you goon

Example 2
Korean Teacher: "Maybe you should give a copy of your alien resident card to the administration."
What the Korean Teacher really means: "Give a copy of your passport to the administration, or you won't get paid. Oh, and give it to them last week."

Here, maybe = definitely 

Example 3
Korean Teacher: "We'll be having a special ceremony today that conflicts with your sixth period class. Maybe you should not teach that class."
Me: "Umm...ok. So are you saying I should find a replacement teacher to teach sixth period in my place so I can come to the ceremony?"
Korean Teacher: "Maybe that would be OK."
What the Korean Teacher really means: "We have a ceremony that conflicts with your sixth period class, and since it's already after fourth period, you should hurry up and figure out whether or not you're going to cancel that class.

In this example, maybe = maybe.

I use these examples not to mock Korean teachers, but rather to underscore my contention, which is that:

"Maybe" is the most AMBIGUOUS word when spoken by Koreans. It means nothing!

 Or rather, it can mean anything from "Of course not" to "Obviously, you didn't know that?!" This situation actually arises more than one might expect, and I just have to poke and prod (read: all but verbally threaten and shank) people to give me solid answers because there's no other real way for me to plan my day. Korean people get really uncomfortable when I ask them to just tell me "yes" or "no," I suppose because they avoid directness at all costs in just about every aspect of life. At first, I would attempt to divine which meaning "maybe" held, but I was almost invariably wrong, and figured that I should just ask before I messed up something really important. 

Amazingly, all Koreans here that speak English seem to have agreed that "maybe" is supposed to carry myriad different meanings, which it should not. Goal: Figure out what mass-distributed book they all read that tells them this lie, write to the publisher, and get it changed. :-)

Now for the funny part! Some stores really need to invest in a good translator...

In Busan--chiken!

So your love motel is called "Comma" but you actually think that a comma is an apostrophe? #couldvegoogledit

This was at a restaurant in downtown Daegu. "A dream in your mouth?" Sketch!

This is taped to the water dispenser near my office. I'm going to have to ask my second graders what they actually meant when they wrote this! 

Korea has cartoons everywhere. Exhibit A: What happens to you if you think you can squeeze into the subway at the last minute. BANG! 

Better hurry and get your sand! Not sandwich, but sand :-)

This is only funny to people who speak Spanish, but "la puta" means "bitch" in Spanish. And there's an island full of them in Busan. LOL

This was back at orientation. My partner and I had to create a lesson with these vocab words, one of which was "ride balls." Enough said. 

Can ANYONE tell me what this means??! 

Funny bar name near our hostel in Busan. VodGa.

So in case the name "Yes" wasn't enough to entice you into buying their clothes, perhaps you'll shop here when you know that the shop has a young emotional story.
...
What?

Next up: Vacation in Busan!